Oka, day 12

An important day for my American friends…..I hope it was full of joy for you.

What made day 12 significant, relative to the remarkable day 11, was how ordinary it was. I was all excited to go to chapel, and enter into prayer, seeking that closeness with the Lord again, and what happened? Dryness and distraction. I had trouble just starting off the prayer, and it felt like all I had to offer was my being there.

But then again, hadn’t that been the point of the previous day? I realised that I was falling into the trap of trying to “package God” and to “routinize” my prayer so that it met *my* desires every time….but if I wasn’t going to turn God into an idol, I had to respect his freedom in the whole affair as well. And today was just not the day for the 4th dwelling again. So I floundered around in the 1st degree of oraison as best I could, slightly amused as what was (or wasn’t) happening. God’s ways are not ours, but today’s lesson was that “total obedience to the Holy Spirit” might also mean honouring even his absence!